Last year I confessed about my love of instant mashed potatoes (recipe here). I don’t eat them all the time, but they are a camping favorite. I feel over-whelmed with the confessional urge again, so I am putting this out for all the world to see: I love that yellow-orange processed American Cheese (2% version). And yes, American cheese and instant mashed potatoes combined are a camping delicacy.
Unlike the instant mashers, American cheese actually has nutritional value. One thin rubbery slice has 25% of the daily calcium requirement. The math is not difficult here: 2 slices equal a whopping 50% of daily calcium. For an aging woman, that is better than winning the big jackpot at bingo.
Why do I make this confession today? I put American cheese in my oatmeal this morning. Now, most often I put yogurt in my oatmeal in my quest for adequate calcium and protein. However, I am out of yogurt. As I search the frig my eyes land eagerly on AMERICAN CHEESE. Oh joy. What a glorious morning. Sounds awful, but try it, I promise you will not be disappointed. Your bones will thank you.
Is there anything more American than American cheese? Think grilled cheese, macaroni and cheese, and nachos with cheese sauce. It is good that one’s diet is patriotic.
If you find my secret love of American cheese shocking, how about this: I read People Magazine online, every day. Where else would I learn why Johnny Depp Proposed to Amber Heard, or why why Katie Perry has faith in Obama, Aliens, and John Mayer? How would I know that Prince Harry designed the toilets for his recent Antarctic trek? How could I live without recipes for Ten Bacon Wrapped Foods? Life would be empty without a glimpse of the World’s Sexiest Man each year.
I know that reading People Magazine out of one eye and Holy Scriptures out of the other seems strange, but People keeps me aware of popular culture. Seriously. No one likes an ivory tower preacher who is out of touch with today’s world. Is there any place where I can get updated faster on pop culture?
One time I made a home visit to a home with a young girl. She was playing with a boy doll who also sang if you pushed a button or something. The girl held the doll out for me to see and I recognized that pop music icon immediately. I carefully took the doll and exclaimed, “Oh, the Biebs! Cool”. She has been my best friend ever since.
I never know what tidbit from People will become a perfect sermon illustration. Some of the stars revel in materialism, self-indulgence, and self-destructive behavior. Others demonstrate leadership, creativity, generosity and persistence. Stars rise and fall, people come back from the brink, and some struggle endlessly in the public eye. The world turns inside People Magazine and I don’t plan on being left out of the great cultural milieu.
Two confessions in one day. I feel so free and alive.